I am here laying on my bed. Everything is quiet and tense. My boyfriend is upset, but not really at anyone. I am honestly waiting to see if he breaks up with me. Yes it’s been that bad of a day. Not a screaming fighting kind of day, more of a quiet awkward day. He’s mad and won’t talk about it.
Aside from all this, my past few days have been good. I went to my mom’s house for Christmas and had a blast with her. It was alot of fun, but since Randall didn’t come with me it gave us a few days apart. Unfortunately since the area where I grew up and where my mom’s house has terrified phone reception, and I think actually goes back in time, Randall and I didn’t talk a lot while I was gone.
My mom and I are a lot alike. She’s influenced how I am in a lot of ways. So when she tells me I don’t need a man in my life or I could do better it really makes me think. Even before I came home I knew I do love Randall and I didn’t care that he doesn’t have a job now. Now since he’s upset and I am guessing depressed because of his unemployment it’s more difficult.
I am just so tired. I am not in the mood for this fight.

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